the trickle down

"I like these cold, gray winter days. Days like these let you savor a bad mood." ~ Bill Watterson

Wednesday, June 29

"In case you haven't noticed, I'm being unfavorably compared with Goebbels"

So this quote is a good one. It applies well to our current national leadership:
“If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it. The lie can be maintained only for such time as the State can shield the people from the political, economic and/or military consequences of the lie. It thus becomes vitally important for the State to use all of its powers to repress dissent, for the truth is the mortal enemy of the lie, and thus by extension, the truth is the greatest enemy of the State.”

-- Joseph Goebbels, Nazi Propaganda Minister
Nice speech last night, Mr. President. While I've not been happy about it, I have been able to stomach a lot of this up until now. I can't blame an administration for pushing the agenda it wishes, but when that agenda no longer contains even an ounce of sense (or new information), it becomes terrible.

Stop cramming September 11, 2001 down our throats. It's in my face all of the time. I understand that it was an awful day and many lives were lost and others ruined. It was a dark day for Americans -- something we'd like to never see again. But then we roll into another nation essentially because we don't agree with their form of government and then just attack and kill people over it? That's not even us. That's not keep John P. American safe from terrorists -- that's just giving people reason to flock to a terrorist's case. To prop your agenda of misguided military action up on the crutch of fear induced by 9-11 for nearly four years is a just a tad bit ridiculous.

I was cool with you doing that in 2001, Mr. President.
It made sense for you to bring that to light in 2002, Mr. President.
It was getting old by the time it was 2003, Mr. President.
I don't think a day went by when I didn't think it was wrong in 2004, Mr. President.
Are you honestly still talking in the same way now in 2005, Mr. President?

I used to think it was impossible for this administration to really be the way they were shown by (Kaes'll love this O'Reilly-like knock) the crazy, zany liberally-biased media types, but this continued deceit is confounding.

This from the President's address:
“The terrorists who attacked us -- and the terrorists we face -- murder in the name of a totalitarian ideology that hates freedom, rejects tolerance, and despises all dissent. Their aim is to remake the Middle East in their own grim image of tyranny and oppression -- by toppling governments, by driving us out of the region, and by exporting terror.”
A group of men that "rejects tolerance" and "despises all dissent," eh? They want to "remake the Middle East in their own ... image," huh? That doesn't sound like what we're doing at all.

I know that this viewpoint has already been expressed millions of times over and that I'm throwing nothing new into the fire, but whatever. Sometimes you just gotta gripe.

Quote gathered from a crazy, zany liberally-biased media type over at DissidentVoice.
Presidential address quotation from the address transcript.
Post title a quote by Sheldon Mopes from Death to Smoochy, and underrated movie.

Tuesday, June 28

Colin: Remember to Read this Again Every So Often

A colleague of mine here at CNET is leaving soon to take on his own startup venture with a friend. He's very excited, and in an email message to the group explaining his reasons for leaving, his memories, and his hopes, he attached Steve Jobs' speech from this year's Stanford graduation. It's pretty exceptional.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

This is the prepared text of the address by Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple
Computer and of Pixar Animation Studios, who spoke at Stanford
Commencement on June 12, 2005.

I am honored to be with you today at your commencement from one of the
finest universities in the world. I never graduated from college.
Truth be told, this is the closest I've ever gotten to a college
graduation. Today I want to tell you three stories from my life.
That's it. No big deal. Just three stories.

The first story is about connecting the dots.

I dropped out of Reed College after the first 6 months, but then
stayed around as a drop-in for another 18 months or so before I really
quit. So why did I drop out?

It started before I was born. My biological mother was a young, unwed
college graduate student, and she decided to put me up for adoption.
She felt very strongly that I should be adopted by college graduates,
so everything was all set for me to be adopted at birth by a lawyer
and his wife. Except that when I popped out they decided at the last
minute that they really wanted a girl. So my parents, who were on a
waiting list, got a call in the middle of the night asking: "We have
an unexpected baby boy; do you want him?" They said: "Of course." My
biological mother later found out that my mother had never graduated
from college and that my father had never graduated from high school.
She refused to sign the final adoption papers. She only relented a
few months later when my patents promised that I would someday go to
college.

And 17 years later I did go to college. But I naively chose a college
that was almost as expensive as Stanford, and all of my working-class
parents' savings were being spent on my college tuition. After six
months, I couldn't see the value in it. I had no idea what I wanted
to do with my life and no idea how college was going to help me figure
it out. And here I was spending all of the money my parents had saved
their entire life. So I decided to drop out and trust that it would
all work out OK. It was pretty scary at the time, but looking back it
was one of the best decisions I ever made. The minute I dropped out I
could stop taking the required classes that didn't interest me, and
begin dropping in on the ones that looked interesting.

It wasn't all romantic. I didn't have a dorm room, so I slept on the
floor in friends' rooms, I returned coke bottles for the 5¢ deposits
to buy food with, and I would walk the 7 miles across town every
Sunday night to get one good meal a week at the Hare Krishna temple.
I loved it. And much of what I stumbled into by following my
curiosity and intuition turned out to be priceless later on. Let me
give you one example:

Reed College at that time offered perhaps the best calligraphy
instruction in the country. Throughout the campus every poster, every
label on every drawer, was beautifully hand calligraphed. Because I
had dropped out and didn't have to take the normal classes, I decided
to take a calligraphy class to learn how to do this. I learned about
serif and san serif typefaces, about varying the amount of space
between different letter combinations, about what makes great
typography great. It was beautiful, historical, artistically subtle
in a way that science can't capture, and I found it fascinating.

None of this had even a hope of any practical application in my life.
But ten years later, when we were designing the first Macintosh
computer, it all came back to me. And we designed it all into the
Mac. It was the first computer with beautiful typography. If I had
never dropped in on that single course in college, the Mac would have
never had multiple typefaces or proportionally spaced fonts. And
since Windows just copied the Mac, its likely that no personal
computer would have them. If I had never dropped out, I would have
never dropped in on this calligraphy class, and personal computers
might not have the wonderful typography that they do. Of course it
was impossible to connect the dots looking forward when I was in
college. But it was very, very clear looking backwards ten years
later.

Again, you can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only
connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots
will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something -
your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let
me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.

My second story is about love and loss.

I was lucky - I found what I loved to do early in life. Woz and I
started Apple in my parents garage when I was 20. We worked hard, and
in 10 years Apple had grown from just the two of us in a garage into a
$2 billion company with over 4000 employees. We had just released our
finest creation - the Macintosh - a year earlier, and I had just
turned 30. And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a
company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I
thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the
first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future
began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did,
our Board of Directors sided with him. So at 30 I was out. And very
publicly out. What had been the focus of my entire adult life was
gone, and it was devastating.

I really didn't know what to do for a few months. I felt that I had
let the previous generation of entrepreneurs down - that I had dropped
the baton as it was being passed to me. I met with David Packard and
Bob Noyce and tried to apologize for screwing up so badly. I was a
very public failure, and I even thought about running away from the
valley. But something slowly began to dawn on me - I still loved what
I did. The turn of events at Apple had not changed that one bit. I
had been rejected, but I was still in love. And so I decided to start
over.

I didn't see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple
was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness
of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner
again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the
most creative periods of my life.

During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another
company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would
become my wife. Pixar went on to create the worlds first computer
animated feature film, Toy Story, and is now the most successful
animation studio in the world. In a remarkable turn of events, Apple
bought NeXT, I retuned to Apple, and the technology we developed at
NeXT is at the heart of Apple's current renaissance. And Laurene and
I have a wonderful family together.

I'm pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn't been
fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the
patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick.
Don't lose faith. I'm convinced that the only thing that kept me
going was that I loved what I did. You've got to find what you love.
And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work
is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be
truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only
way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it
yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart,
you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it
just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking
until you find it. Don't settle.

My third story is about death.

When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: "If you live
each day as if it was your last, someday you'll most certainly be
right." It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33
years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: "If
today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about
to do today?" And whenever the answer has been "No" for too many days
in a row, I know I need to change something.

Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've
ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because
almost everything - all external expectations, all pride, all fear of
embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of
death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that your
are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking
you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no
reason not to follow your heart.

About a year ago I was diagnosed with cancer. I had a scan at 7:30 in
the morning, and it clearly showed a tumor on my pancreas. I didn't
even know what a pancreas was. The doctors told me this was almost
certainly a type of cancer that is incurable, and that I should expect
to live no longer than three to six months. My doctor advised me to
go home and get my affairs in order, which is doctor's code for
prepare to die. It means to try to tell your kids everything you
thought you'd have the next 10 years to tell them in just a few
months. It means to make sure everything is buttoned up so that it
will be as easy as possible for your family. It means to say your
goodbyes.

I lived with that diagnosis all day. Later that evening I had a
biopsy, where they stuck an endoscope down my throat, through my
stomach and into my intestines, put a needle into my pancreas and got
a few cells from the tumor. I was sedated, but my wife, who was
there, told me that when they viewed the cells under a microscope the
doctors started crying because it turned out to be a very rare form of
pancreatic cancer that is curable with surgery. I had the surgery and
I'm fine now.

This was the closest I've been to facing death, and I hope its the
closest I get for a few more decades. Having lived through it, I can
now say this to you with a bit more certainty than when death was a
useful but purely intellectual concept:

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don't want
to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share.
No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because
Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life's
change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right
now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will
gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so
dramatic, but it is quite true.

Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life.
Don't be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other
people's thinking. Don't let the noise of other's opinions drown out
your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow
your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly
want to become. Everything else is secondary.

When I was young, there was an amazing publication called The Whole
Earth Catalog, which was one of the bibles of my generation. It was
created by a fellow named Stewart Brand not far from here in Menlo
Park, and he brought it to life with his poetic touch. This was in
the late 1960's, before personal computers and desktop publishing, so
it was all made with typewriters, scissors, and polaroid cameras. It
was sort of like Google in paperback form, 35 years before Google came
along: it was idealistic, and overflowing with neat tools and great
notions.

Stewart and his team put out several issues of The Whole Earth
Catalog, and then when it had run its course, they put out a final
issue. It was the mid-1970s, and I was your age. On the back cover
of their final issue was a photograph of an early morning country
road, the kind you might find yourself hitchhiking on if you were so
adventurous. Beneath it were the words: "Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish."
It was their farewell message as they signed off. Stay Hungry. Stay
Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you
graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you.

Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.

Thank you all very much.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

I've got to do that more, myself.

Monday, June 27

The Low Quality of Televised Entertainment

If it isn't a show on forensics, the History Channel, or sports on television at my house, it's a re-run of a sitcom. It's all largely dependent on who holds the remote, and all of those things can be really cool and interesting in their own right... but they're pretty bad when it comes down to it.

And that's the TV I kind of like. I'm not talking about the TV that everyone else in the world seems to like. This KaesPlace cartoon got me thinking... is reality television really that popular or are the ratings so high because of people that are too bored or tired to flip the channel. We're Americans, so we naturally enjoy anything that's fancy and electronic --or-- anything that serves a purpose we used to serve ourselves. If something can combine those factors (like television), then we're extra happy.

But we can't, even en masse, really appreciate all of this reality television, political pandering, and other garbage that is currently polluting the airwaves as much as the people at Nielson think we do, can we? It's all just too terrible that there has to be some other factor conspiring to make bad television popular.

I can only beliebe that factor is that everyone in the world is an idiot.

Thursday, June 23

Yeah.

I uninstalled that Oufoxed extension. It's a great idea, but not widely adopted. It slows down the browser just enough to make it difficult to keep it if no one else also uses it.

Monday, June 20

Outfoxed!

Add Outfoxed to your Firefox browser. It lets you communicate your good/bad/dangerous ratings for websites to other users in your network (and also share their opinions). Google is enhanced to show the opinions of others you know in your results, and it's just a great idea.

Colin's Outfoxed Reports

You can sign up for free and we can inform each other (nerd giggle).

Thursday, June 16

Storm's a Brewin'

This just in from weather.com: thunder is in the vicinity.



I just think that's a funny way to say there's a thunderstorm. Maybe it's more accurate that just saying "T-Storm," but I'm not sure.

Anyway, back to work.

Monday, June 13

Learn Something Every Day

Take a look at this calendar of the three months from August through October, 1752:


August 1752 September 1752 October 1752
Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa Su Mo Tu We Th Fr Sa
1 1 2 14 15 16 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
2 3 4 5 6 7 8 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 8 9 10 11 12 13 14
9 10 11 12 13 14 15 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 15 16 17 18 19 20 21
16 17 18 19 20 21 22 22 23 24 25 26 27 28
23 24 25 26 27 28 29 29 30 31
30 31


See how there are eleven days missing from September? That's when the Gregorian calendar reformation was regarded to have taken place. You can get all sorts of cool info like this right from your Linux workstation:

%cal -3 9 1752 produces the calendar you see above.

%man cal includes this informative diatribe:
The Gregorian Reformation is assumed to have occurred in 1752 on the 3rd
of September. By this time, most countries had recognized the reforma-
tion (although a few did not recognize it until the early 1900's.) Ten
days following that date were eliminated by the reformation, so the cal-
endar for that month is a bit unusual.


And they're to a verdict in the Michael Jackson trial: not guilty. I can't quite wrap my mind around that one.

Things to Find a Way to Buy

There are some gadgety and toy things I'd like to buy. The major drawback is that I have very little money. Hmm. Here's a list of some of the things I'd like to grab sometime soon:
  • Desktop Computer (self-built PC or iMac G5)
    Laptop made it four years, but just can't crush anymore when it also holds all music, photos, emails, and documents. A desktop machine could become my primary computer and then the laptop would be cleaned, gutted, and used in a more laptop way: taken to the lab, class, etc. Apple's future move from PowerPC to x86 is the real question mark. If it looks like that will truly take over two years to come to fruition, then I might still be able to get away with getting an iMac, now, and trading up for something better then.
    Target Budget: $900 - $1600 (ish)
  • New Digital Still Camera (Canon SD300, SD400, or other)
    I have not been taking pictures with my camera that much since it has been "bettered" by a lot of people that happen to have faster, smaller, lighter cameras that exceed mine in quality. My Olympus has been excellent and still works well, but it would be nice to have a more compact and speedier camera for use.
    Target Budget: $250 - $350
  • Digital Video Camera
    It would be really nice to be able to have one of these. I've wanted one since working on Living Young. I don't know how much I'd actually use it, though. I think years of DV footage shot of friends and places would be much less interesting than excellent snapshots. But if Kasey and I ever do put together our film project, we'll need a camera and I really would have fun making some cool movies from time to time. This is pretty much not quite worth it at this juncture, but somewhere down the line.
    Target Budget: Undecided ~$400
  • Many, Many DVDs
    I plan to finally upgrade all worthwhile VHS to DVD (Dogma and Usual Suspects are still lying around on cassette, 10Things, WetHot ~ can't find DVD anymore, etc.). I also want to just go through a video store like FYE and buy what I feel like in $100 bursts. There's so much that's worth it to own. I sometimes compile desireables here.
  • Pants and Shirts
    I would like to get some more pants that I like (currently there are two pair of pants I would wear all of the time if cleanliness permitted) that can be both casual and worn in the business environment. I would like to grab some more shirts, too. Not dress shirts, but collared, button-downs. And I'm still in need of a size revamp: replace all incredibly oversized clothing with more fitting articles.
    Total Budget: Who knows!? Too expensive.
Meh. Lists like this make me feel like a whiny, materialistic ass. I'll leave it alone, for now.

Wednesday, June 8

Access Granted

Finally, access is granted. After they finish up lunch on the west
coast, I suppose they then address account access issues. Turns out it
wasn't my fault at all.

Now to actually beginning working on this thing that's kind of got me
boggled on closer inspection. Lalala.

Hi There

I'm sitting at my desk at CNET in Bridgewater. I've been assigned a
pretty interesting task of writing a utility that will make the apache
cleanipcs tool port-specific. It has to compare the shared memory
regions of the web server's machine, somehow match the shared memory
segments with the server running on the chosen port, and terminate
only those segments of shared memory. It's to be used under
development for clearing out memory when an application terminates or
the server crashes. You can't just use ipcrm, because that can
eliminate portions of the server's shared memory used for chaching
documents or other innerworkings of a server on another port.

So that's all pretty cool and this is basically the "get your feet
wet" project for me. But there's this hitch... the techs in CA have
yet to get my dev server access approved, so I'm basically doing lots
of research and not getting anywhere on programming, because I can't
get onto any of the boxes I need. Who knows how many things the tech
assigned to getting my account up has to do, today, but I can tell
from the trouble ticket that getting me access isn't a priority of
his.

Sigh.